Now that I'm over the Channel and driving through France I feel very alone. I don't speak French, so it's hard to know what's going on around me. Right now I feel more as though I'm travelling away than travelling towards, and it's hard. I've spent the morning riding through the most beautiful countryside in glorious sunshine and thinking the whole time how much nicer it would seem if I were facing the other way ...
The church helps. It's not as gaudily baroque as some French Catholic churches, so it's easier to feel at home. I've been able to pray and sit in quiet. Still feeling downbeat, but for weeks now I've been wrestling with nerves, anxiety, uncertainty, and now homesickness around this trip. I'm going to do again what I've done all the other times. Look that feeling in the eye, say 'thanks for letting me know how you're doing,' and then press on anyway waiting for something better.
As a much travelled individual myself, sometimes in pretty awful places around the World, I would say your emotions are quite normal at this stage of your venture. As I am sure you are doing always keep at the back of your mind the reason you are doing what you are doing, and remember those of us you have left behind who love you dearly and fully support the tremendous efforts you are making for what you believe in.
ReplyDeleteBut there are so many of us all now travelling alongside you - many of whom you don’t even know - and after your Tuesday evening reflection I and several of my friends all have reset ourselves to use slow as opposed to hurry!
ReplyDeleteWe are all with you as you journey.
Praying for you, Chris! Loving the journey so far! Andrew Turnbull
ReplyDeleteI'm so proud of you, I think it's wonderful you have travelled this far. Take care x
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you are feeling low. Lots of people asking after you and interested in finding about the journey. Prayers for peace and wellbeing. X
ReplyDeletePrayers from your home community here at Launde Abbey...
ReplyDeleteAs Alison Collis says-we are travelling alongside you. Time will pass. Fear always comes against us when we face new things. But if you think about it, everything you’re doing right now is something that at one time you had never done before. Instead of being afraid of new things, try to be excited about new challenges and opportunities ahead.
ReplyDeleteThanks, everyone, for your kind encouragement and prayers. I want this to be an honest (and real time) record of my pilgrimage, as though you're traveling with me. So it's not all good times. But all pilgrims who travel in company draw comfort from their companions. You've given that comfort to me. I press on!
ReplyDeleteEmbracing the pain is part of the pilgrimage - it takes your mind and soul to a place that is ready to hear. It's okay.
ReplyDeleteLove this Denise. There is pain in the offering. 🙏🏻
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